


SOUTHERN MOTHERFUCKING DEMOCRATIC REPUBLICANS

by hoedogg



Series: Revolutionary Texts [3]
Category: Hamilton - Miranda
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, Coming Out, F/M, M/M, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Secret Relationship, burr is still trans, but thats irrelevant to fic, mads is also gay on the downlow, ok TJeffs is gay on downlow, this looks shit ik im sorry it wont be bad, which is also pretty irrelevant
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-06-04
Updated: 2017-01-03
Packaged: 2018-07-12 04:58:01
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 13
Words: 4,865
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7086364
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/hoedogg/pseuds/hoedogg
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>group chats between democratic republicans? a horrible idea. here's a fic about it.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. mac n cheese

**Author's Note:**

> Ayy was gonna make this earlier but basically summer school makes me want to commit more and more everyday and it's only been a week so I haven't written much  
> I actually haven't written at all  
> I pretty much just woke up at 5:30am and randomly made this  
> You're welcome?  
> idk but hey if ya wanna read the other two fics of this series go on ahead boi  
> enjOy

**jeffersass >> madelicious, feel the burrn**

**jeffersass:** i have nothing to live for

 **jeffersass:** nothing will ever help me through the struggles I am going through

 **jeffersass:** what's the point of living

 **jeffersass:** i should just give up

 **madelicious:** dont tell me you spilled mac n cheese on yourself again

 **feel the burrn:** it was hot wasn't it

 **jeffersass:** :(

 **jeffersass:** life is cruel

 **jeffersass:** im all burnt on my stomach and I got it all over my new sweater

 **jeffersass:** u know the purple one

 **feel the burrn:** you only ever wear purple

 **madelicious:** true but at least they vary in shades

 **feel the burrn:** im not good with telling shades of colors if it looks purple it's purple

 **jeffersass:** how barbaric,,,

 **jeffersass:** you know back in the old days only royalty could wear purple

 **madelicious:** you're not royalty

 **jeffersass:** oh please im the king AND the queen

 **madelicious:** you're ridiculous

 **jeffersass:** oh please you like it

 **feel the burrn:** ok so can you start making more Mac N cheese because I'm hungry and theo won't be back for a while

 **jeffersass:** yeah ok

 **madelicious:** yeah i wanna come too

 **jeffersass:** alright

 **madelicious:** u the real mvp

 **feel the burrn:** the what

 **jeffersass:** never mind that burr what kind of cheese do you prefer

 **feel the burrn:** can you make either like last time

 **jeffersass:** will do my man

 **madelicious:** burr it's weird you don't like mac n cheese

 **feel the burrn:** why?

 **madelicious:** well pretty much everyone's childhood at one point included great mac n cheese

 **feel the burrn:** my grandpa was usually busy so the only thing I knew how to make was boxed Mac n cheese and I ate so much of it I couldn't stand the taste of it

 **feel the burrn:** i like some just not boxed kind

 **jeffersass:** a tragedy

 **madelicious:** only you would find that tragic

 **jeffersass:** the food won't be done for a while

 **feel the burrn:** im willing to wait for it

 **madelicious:** ^

 **jeffersass:** one of you go buy a shitty early 2000s teen movie so we can watch it

 **madelicious:** you wanna mean girls

 **jeffersass:** Y E S

 **jeffersass:** burr you want mean girls

 **feel the burrn:** ill watch whatever

 **madelicious:** im at the store who wants candy

 **jeffersass:** i want sour patch kids

 **feel the burrn:** ill have whatever you bring

 **madelicious:** cool im getting a butter finger

 **jeffersass:** im going to steal it from u

 **madelicious:** no one will lay a finger on my butter finger


	2. explode

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> james seriously shouldn't have introduced tommyboy to soul punk.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> OH MY GOD GUYS IT'S BEEN TWO MONTHS I'M A DICK PLEASE FORGIVE ME
> 
> I HAVE NO EXCUSES I'M SORRY FUCKUFICK  
> I'M SO SORRY BUT I'M BACK HI I'M ALSO IN HIGHSCHOOL NOW WHICH IS WIIIILD DUDES
> 
> ive also only interacted with a whopping number of four girls in the past month ive been in school and the rest have been me yelling at guys,,,, yeah im totally gonna get some pussy this year,,..,..,.,. . 
> 
> A N Y. W A Y
> 
> enjoy ;))

**jeffersass >> madelicious, feel the burrn**

**jeffersass:** CLAP IF YOU'VE GOT A TICKET TO THE END OF THE WORLD

 **jeffersass:** CLAP IF YOU'VE GOT A TICK TO THE END OF THE WORLD

 **jeffersass:** oH

 **feel the burrn:** what

 **jeffersass:** IT WAS HIS LAST DAY ON THE FORCE

 **jeffersass:** HE WAS GOIN THROUGH DIVORCE

 **feel the burrn:** what's going on

 **jeffersass:** HE WAS A LIVING

 **jeffersass:** BREATHING

 **jeffersass:** ACTION SCREENPLAY CLICHE

 **jeffersass:** THEY SAID THAT THEY FOUND IT IN THE BASEMENT

 **feel the burrn:** James help

 **madelicious** : i gotchu

 **madelicious:** im going to take his phone away

 **jeffersass:** WAIT NO WHY

 **madelicious:** i should have never showed you soul punk

 **jeffersass:** …

 **jeffersass:** ENOUGH TO JUST BLOW THAT ROOF TO THE PAVEMENT

 **madelicious:** that's it

 **jeffersass:** FiCNk

 **feel the burrn:** guys?

 **feel the burrn:** it's been like four minutes why hasn't anyone said anything

 **feel the burrn:** oh God James did you kill him

 **jeffersass:** this is james i took thomas’ phone away

 **feel the burrn:** where is he?

 **jeffersass:** im sitting on his back

 **jeffersass:** hes flopping around like a fish wanna see

 **feel the burrn:**...yes…

**jeffersass has sent a video.**

**feel the burrn:** is he still singing the song

 **jeffersass:** sadly

 **jeffersass:** tell me Burr should i hit him upside the head or choke him out

 **feel the burrn:** i think just smacking him will be a lot less deadly

 **jeffersass:** i did it and he's currently screaming and cursing me out in French

 **feel the burrn:** sweet jesus

 **jeffersass:** I GOT MY PHONE BACK YES

 **feel the burrn:** this is thomas im guessing

 **jeffersass:** THE ONE AND ONLY

 **feel the burrn:** how'd you manage that

 **jeffersass:** i have my ways

 **feel the burrn:** oh

 **madelicious:** ok we gotta go now Burr bye

 **feel the burrn:** wait what

 **jeffersass:** yep bye buddy boy

 **feel the burrn:** uh bye?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I wonder where our boys ran off to in such a hurry,,,.,....,.,....


	3. candy

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> burr has a very annoying convo wother hamilton and we have a secret on our hands

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> WHAT THE FYCK HOW HAS IT BEEN LIKE THREE WEEKS  
> I swear to God I can't feel time going forward it feels like I updated just yesterday ugh  
> BUT(t) anyway here's a new late chapter feel free to tell me to kill myself in the comments  
> Enjoy ;)
> 
> EDIT: i also forgot to mention last night that the first part of the fic w alex actually happened like i was a detective to guilt trip her outta her candy. i got three pieces out of it

**ham & cheese >> feel the burrn**

**ham & cheese: ** burr.

**ham & cheese:** BURR

**ham & cheese: ** you can't ignore me

**feel the burrn:** we are in class and you're sitting right next to me. Please stop texting me

**feel the burrn:** you're not even supposed to be texting

**ham & cheese:** did you think you could hide that shit from me Burr 

**feel the burrn:** hide what alexander

**ham & cheese: ** the fact that you have candy

**feel the burrn:** sweet jesus I don't have candy

**ham & cheese:** ive been watching you

**ham & cheese: ** you threw the rapper in your bag and tried to play it off like you were yawning when you put it in your mouth

**ham & cheese: ** you ain't gonna share?

**feel the burrn:** i dont have anymore

**ham & cheese:** liar

**feel the burrn:** are you kidding me

**ham & cheese: ** when I asked you to share some the first thing you said was no which implies that you have more to give but simply don't want to(like a stingy bitch). If you really didn't have anymore you would have told me that as soon as I asked.

**ham & cheese: ** now hand it over

**feel the burrn:** will you stop bothering me if I give you one

**ham & cheese:** maaaaybe

**feel the burrn:** just take it

 

**feel the burrn >> jeffersass, madelicious **

**feel the burrn:** now im not one for complaint but look at the conversation I just had with Alexander

**feel the burrn sent a photo.**

**feel the burrn sent a photo.**

**feel the burrn sent a photo.**

**jeffersass:** why do you even sit with him I'd cut his fingers off

**madelicious:** honestly^

**feel the burrn:** he sits next to me idk why

**jefferaass:** hes like a dog

**jeffersass:** give em food once and he thinks you're automatically best buds

**madelicious:** eh he's more like a parrot he never stops talking until you put a blanket over him

**feel the burrn:** by they way does anyone understand why he calls me Aaron Burr, sir

**jeffersass:** because he's a dumbass?

**madelicious:** hes lonely and has nothing better to do?

**jeffersass:** hes ugly?

**madelicious:** his hair is greasy?

**jeffersass:** he has no fashion sense?

**madelicious:** hes a pig?

**feel the burrn:** yall done

**jeffersass:** trust me i have a power point presentation, a six page essay, and have written an entire textbook on why hamilton should leave my life

**jeffersass:** no I'm not done

**feel the burrn:** the teacher is staring at me gtg

**jeffersass:** hamilton is shit

**madelicious:** he literally looks like a forty year old man

**jeffersass:** and have you seen his place? It's a fucking mess

**madelicious:** can't be as bad as his life choices

**jefferass:** or his taste in music

**madelicious:** or his sleep schedule

**jefferass:** or his comedy

**feel the burrn has left the chat.**

**madelicious:** aw he left

**jeffersass:** lmao the teacher probably called him out and he got scared

**jeffersass:** what a nerd

**madelicious:** Thomas a teacher called you out once and you fell out of your seat

**jeffersass:** unfriended. blocked. reported. deported. get out of my life.

**madelicious:** rude

**jeffersass:** wait you do have class rn right

**madelicious:** no

**madelicious:** you?

**jeffersass:** nope

**jeffersass:** you know what that means ;))

**madelicious:** Thomas when are we going to tell people

**jeffersass:** i don't know

**jeffersass:** just not yet jem ok

**madelicious:** but no one's going to care

**jeffersass:** i already told you

**madelicious:** you know what fine I don't care

**jeffersass:** come on

**jeffersass:** jem please

**jeffersass:** :(

**jeffersass:** b

**jeffersass:** a

**jeffersass:** b

**jeffersass:** e

**madelicious:** can you stop now

**jeffersass:** will you forgive me

**jeffersass:** ill show you how sorry I am

**jeffersass:** if you know what I mean ;)

**madelicious:** no

**jeffersass:** ok how bout I buy dinner and we can watch a shitty movie and I'll give you a bj maybe

**madelicious:** how romantic

**madelicious:** fine

**madelicious:** im still mad though 

**jefferaass:** ill make it up to you

**madelicious:** just hurry up and get my food

**jeffersass:** ;D

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> lmao it's almost twelve and I can't sleep so I hope you enjoyed that cringy jeffmads sorry fam :// it'll be better when I get sleep pls bare with me


	4. fruit

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> you can learn a lot about someone based on their favorite fruit

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Wowza i updated quickly. Don't get used to it since I only uploaded because I felt shitty over dumb stuff. So yeah just hope I have bad days more often  
> yeah enjoy
> 
> EDIT: i forgot to mention that towards the middle there's some p controversial stuff so if ur offended easily skip it or try to fight me on it idc

**madelicious >> jeffersass, feel the burrn**

**madelicious:** i really like fruit

**madelicious:** but not all fruit some fruit is just weird

**jeffersass:** wtf

**feel the burrn:** fruit is ok

**madelicious:** im a firm believer that you can learn a lot about someone through their favorite fruit

**madelicious:** what's ur favorite fruit

**jeffersass:** i like bananas

**jeffersass:** that's not gay right

**jeffersass:** fuck it is isn't it

**jeffersass:** can i change mine

**madelicious:** no you cant.

**madelicious:** @burr wby what's your favorite fruit

**feel the burrn:** i dont really have one

**jeffersass:** LAMP

**madelicious:** lamp

**jeffersass:** LMAE*

**feel the burrn:** lmae

**jeffersass:** L A M E** **** * ** * 

**feel the burrn:** u ok

**madelicious:** doubtful

**jeffersass:** kys

**madelicious:** i love when you make typos

**feel the burrn:** same

**jeffersass:** you're both typos

**feel the burrn:** im OFFENDED

**madelicious:** my heart </3 :’(

**jeffersass:** this is oppression

**jeffersass:** I BET IT'S BECAUSE I'M BLACK

**jeffersass:** AND FROM VIRGINIA

**jeffersass:** YALL A COUPLE OF RACISTS SMFH

**madelicious:** we’re literally all black people

**feel the burrn:** excuse you i am white

**madelicious:** die @burr

**jeffersass:** is this reverse racism

**jeffersass:** is that a thing

**madelicious:** no. You could be baby fucking jesus telling me reverse racism is a real issue and I'd still fight you

**feel the burrn:** how did we go from fruit to typos to racism and fighting baby jesus

**jeffersass:** ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯

**madelicious:** life

**jeffersass:** speaking of life I hate mine

**feel the burrn:** why

**jeffersass:** because i ruined my favorite shirt

**madelicious:** first world problems

**jeffersass:** you're my first world problems

**feel the burrn:** that sounded oddly sexual

**jeffersass:** go away

**feel the burrn:** :’(((

**madelicious:** aaron you still haven't told me your favorite fruit

**feel the burrn:** apples are my favorite

**madelicious:** ok so ur basic af got it

**feel the burrn:** im sorry but what's your favorite Mr Interesting

**madelicious:** grapefruit

**jeffersass:** WHAT

**jeffersass:** DONT TOUCH ME

**madelicious:** what they're good

**jeffersass:** whO ARE YOY

**feel the burrn:** yoy

**jeffersass has left the chat.**

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Idk yall can request specific chapter ideas or whatever you wanna see added to the series itself that'd be p cool(and helpful)


	5. lams

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> sometimes lams is good, but when you're in a position like thomas, it can be all sorts of hell on earth.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ok ik this has been like my third update today but it's 2am, I can't sleep, and @dianapeachez had a good idea for a chapter so sue me
> 
> If yall wanna follow their steps and make a request for a chapter or whatever feel free to do so  
> Or don't i dont control you
> 
> Anyway enjoy ;))

**jeffersass >> madelicious, feel the burrn**

**jeffersass:** ggGGzUYS

**jeffersass:** I WANT TO KILL MYSELF

**jeffersass:** THIS IS THE END OF ME TELL ANGELICA I STILL THINK SHE'S HOT

**madelicious:** :///

**feel the burrn:** are you okay

**jeffersass:** IM NOT EVEN JOKING WHEN I SAY I WANT TO DIE THIS TIME THIS IS NO A DRILL

**madelicious:** jfc what happened

**jeffersass:** OK SO I WAS GOIN ABOUT MY DAY

**jeffersass:** AND I WAS GONNA WORK ON A PAPER AT THE SCHOOLS SECOND LIBRARY as if we even need a second one smh YOU KNOW THE ONE NOBODY EVER USES BECAUSE THE OTHER ONE IS CLOSER TO THE VENDING MACHINES

**feel the burrn:** im slightly worried about what's going to happen next

**madelicious:** only slightly?

**jeffersass:** AND WHEN I WALKEDD IN

**jeffersass:** GOD I CAN BARELY SAY IT

**jeffersass:** HAMILTON AND THAT LAURENS GUY WERE IN THERW

**feel the burrn:** uh oh

**jeffersass:** I WALKED IN ON THEM HAVING SUCH SUCH A FUCKING HEATED MAKE OUT SESSION IT WAS DISGUSTING

**madelicious:** WHAT

**feel the burrn:** called it

**jeffersass:** THEY WERE CLOSE TO FUCKING I COULD FEELK IT IN MY BONES

**jeffersass:** THAT'S NOT EVEN THE WORST PART

**madelicious:** im gonna puke I stg

**jeffersass:** ALEXANDER TURNS AND SEES MY FUCKING HORRIFIED FACE AFTER I SCREAMED AT THE TOP OF MY LUNGS AND INSTEAD OF BEING A REAL PERSON AND BEING EMBARRASSED OR SOME SHIT HE SMILED AND !!!!! FUCKING !!!! STARTED !!!! SUCKING! !! HICKEYS !!! ON !!!!!! JOHNS !!!! NECK !!!!!!!!!!!!#!!!!!  ###!! ! !!! !

**feel the burrn:** im sorry what

**madelicious:** i

**jeffersass:** OH QND DON'T GET ME STARTED ON LAURENS HE DIDN'T EVEN ATTEMPT TO STOP HAMILTON HE SEEMED TO LIKE IT EVEN MORE?? ?

**madelicious:** FUVL EW

**feel the burrn:** brb im telling theodosia rn

**jeffersass:** iM FUCKING SSSHHAKINGG

**madelicious:** IM SO SORRY

**jeffersass:** THEY DIDN'T STOP TILL I RAN AWAY

**jeffersass:** YOU'RE SORRY BUT I CAN HEAR YOU PISSINF YOURSELF LAUGHING FROM THE OTHER ROOM YOU FAKE BITCH ,? ???? 

**madelicious:** I CAN'T HELP IT IM SORRY

**jeffersass:** I HATE YOU

**feel the burrn:** i told theo and you should have seen her face

**feel the burrn:** it went from mortified to worried to amused to dead in the matter of seconds 

**feel the burrn:** im pretty sure this would be 0 to 100 real quick

**jeffersass:** FIRST OF ALL

**jeffersass:** I DON'T EVER WANT TO HEAR AN OLD MAN LIKE YOU SAY THAT EVER AGAIN

**jeffersass:** SECOND OF ALL

**jeffersass:** JAMES IS STILL LAUGHING

**madelicious:** I SWEAR I CAN'T STOP NOW

**feel the burrn:** Theo is telling everyone btw

**jeffersass:** please tell me she left my name out of this

**feel the burrn:** yeah about that

**jeffersass:** FUCK

**madelicious:** rip forever you will be missed

**madelicious:** not by me but I'm sure someone will

**jeffersass:** WHERE'S MY GUN

**feel the burrn:** i may or may not be laughing too im not gonna lie

**jeffersass:** IM BLOCKING BOTH OF YOY

**feel the burrn:** …

**jeffersass:** dont

**feel the burrn:** fine

**madelicious:** yOY

**jeffersass:** ILL NEVER CATCH A BREAK

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Alex and John areally a couple of hoes :/// also if any of yall are wondering where the actual jeffmads is itstill probably coming soon(ish) maybe


	6. faithfulwife

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> thomas must be invited everywhere, and we meet theo.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I realized I mention theodosia a good amount but haven't actually included her oops here u go. also once again i haven't posted in a long time but I stg the weeks are starting to blend together ik I've said it before but jfc it's getting serious yall  
> Also I was gonna go to pride today but couldn't because I had to go to tutoring and ithe was gonna be my first time going so im feelin deoressed and betrayed :)  
> Anyway  
> Enjoy

**feel the burrn >> jeffersass, madelicious **

**feel the burrn:** guys guess what

**jeffersass:** kys nobody cares lmao

**madelicious:** no one likes you @thomas

**madelicious:** what were you going to say aaron 

**feel the burrn:** well i was gonna say that theo is dragging me to go to the mall with her and I wanted to know if you both wanted to go with us so we could get food later but

**feel the burrn:** Thomas isn't invited anymore

**feel the burrn:** so how about it James

**jeffersass:** wAIT BEST FRIEND NO I WAS JUST KIDDING HAHA I CARE ABOUT EVERYTHING YOU SAY ALWAYS 

**madelicious:** ill be there :)

**madelocious:** @thomas no you lost your chances

**jeffersass:** PLEASE

**feel the burrn:** i dont know….

**jeffersass:** ill buy you a big mac

**feel the burrn:** you can come

**jeffersass:** YES

**madelicious:** ill buy you a big mac and whatever else you want if you have Thomas not go

**feel the burrn:** hmmmmm

**jeffersass:** NO WAIT PLEASE ILL DO ANYTHING 

**feel the burrn:** i feel so powerful 

**jeffersass:** WHY DON'T YOU WANT ME TO GO @JAMES

**madelicious:** you get sad every time your friends go out without you and it's so funny you just hang around my room and hide under the covers until I have to slap you for you to leave

**feel the burrn:** wow really

**jeffersass:** HE'S A LIAR

**madelicious:** i have pictures

**jeffersass:** WHAT

**madelicious sent a picture.**

**madelicious sent a picture.**

**madelicious sent a picture.**

**madelicious sent a video.**

**feel the burrn:** that's sad and i dont even know where France is located

**feel the burrn:** hold up theo needs to see this

**feel the burrn has added faithfulwife.**

**feel the burrn:** this is what happens when Thomas isn't invited to go out with his friends

**faithfulwife:** oh boy

**madelicious:** it's pitiful

**jeffersass:** IHATEYOUIHATEYOUIHATEYOY

**faithfulwife:** lol yoy

**jeffersass:** NOT YOU TOO

**jeffersass:** IM GONE

**jeffersass has left the chat.**

**faithfulwife has added jeffersass.**

**faithfulwife:** yeet bitch

**madelicious:** ok ik you're dating aaron and all but i think after that we are obligated to get married

**faithfulwife:** id refuse but I've seen how buff u are so I think yes

**feel the burrn:** id threaten to fight you james but as theo has pointed out, I've seen how buff you are

**feel the burrn:** all I ask is that I be the best man

**madelicious:** i agree

**faithfulwife:** lol lets not invite thomas 

**jeffersass has left the chat.**

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> lmao faithfulwife,, ,.,..get it.,., ,,,, ok I'll leave. expect more of our girl


	7. high - reprise

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> it's thomas' first time smoking and james wants to die.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm like randomly anxious and I have total eclipse of the heart stuck in my head cool cool  
> But yeah im sorry if I'm getting too hectic with updating rly often and then suddenly not updating for days and I'd promise to do better but it'll never happen so,,, oops?  
> But yeah I've never taken a drug in my life besides painkillers from when I broke my foot so this is probably not how people act when they're high but ? ??ah well

**madelicious >> jeffersass, feel the burrn, faithfulwife**

**madelicious:** guys Thomas bought weed

**madelicious:** it's his first time smoking and he's such a piece of shit to deal with

**faithfulwife:** weird I always imagined he'd be the type to have smoked as early as eighth grade

**feel the burrn:** ^

**feel the burrn:** but how is he the worst

**jeffersass:** HELLLOOOOOO HOW ARE MY CHILDRENS

**feel the burrn:** oh

**madelicious:** hes literally jumping up and down singing Katy Perry lyrics it's time to pull the trigger

**jeffersass:** J EMMY YOU LUV ME W ALL YA HEART DON'T DEN Y IT

**madelicious:** kill yourself

**madelicious:** i swear to God when I find whoever gave him this weed im going to cut their dick off

**faithfulwife:** why does it have to be a man

**madelicious:** i swear to God when I find whoever gave him this weed im going to cut their head off

**faithfulwife:** good man

**feel the burrn:** where's thomas

**madelicious:** he ran to his room to play violin

**madelicious:** hes playing really loudly

**jeffersass has sent a video.**

**madelicious:** THOMAS YOU'RE IN YOUR UNDERWEAR OH MY GOD PUT YOUR CLOTHES BACK ON

**feel the burrn:** THEODOSIA DON'T OPEN IT

**faithfulwife:** too late ://

**faithfulwife:** bae why don't you have abs like those

**feel the burrn:** THEO

**faithfulwife:** IM KIDDING

**jeffersass has sent a video.**

**madelicious:** T H o MA S PUT YOUR CLOTHES ON 

**feel the burrn:** ngl he does have nice abs

**madelicious:** aaron you're straight

**feel the burrn:** straight =/= blind

**faithfulwife:** are we going to ignore the fact that he's playing im so sorry

**madelicious:** by imagine dragons?

**feel the burrn:** oh wow he is

**jeffersass:** IM GONNA PLAY TOTAL ECLIPSE OF DA HARTO 

**madelicious:** W EEB SHSHEJEB

**feel the burrn:** tbh he's not that much different from when hes sober he's just naked now

**faithfulwife:** ^^^^^^^^

**madelicious:** FUCK HE'S EATING EVERYTHING IN THE FRIDGE NO

**madelicious:** HE FOUND MY CHOCOLATE PLEASE GOD

**feel the burrn:** this is just

**faithfulwife:** lmaooooo

**jeffersass:** I REALLY NEED YOU TONIIIIIIGHT 

**jeffersass:** FOREVERS GONNA START TONIIIiiIGHT

**madelicious:** im going to jump 

**faithfulwife:** james im sorry but me and aaron need to go out rn

**faithfulwife:** we hate to leave you but,,,

**feel the burrn:** ^

**madelicious:** WAIT NO PLEASE

**faithfulwife has left the chat.**

**feel the burrn has left the chat.**

**madelicious:** why god why

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> James wants to die lmao but yeah request what u want to happen in chapters or what you want to see in the series it's the only thing that gets me writing


	8. cat

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> thomas met alexs cat and now he wants one of his own. mads the mom does not want this to happen

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ok I don't expect none of yall to have noticed this bc it was completely unintentional but I realized that at first in this fic Burr didn't rly interact in the chats and he never rly gave his opinions and stayed neutral but when theo came in he suddenly talked more and made little remarks and he's a lil more opiniated now and im just like?? ? ??? Theo brings out his more reserved side
> 
> I literally accidentally made them goals af  
> Anyway enjoy

**jeffersass >> madelicious, faithfulwife, feel the burrn**

**jeffersass:** HAVE ANY OF YOU MET PHILIP

**madelicious:** who

**jeffersass:** HAMILTONS CAT

**feel the burrn:** me and theo have met him once or twice 

**faithfulwife:** hes so cute

**madelicious:** wait why did he show you his cat he literally hates you

**jeffersass:** HE WANTED TO RUB IT IN MY FACE THAT HE HAS A CUTE LIL KITTEN TO MAKE ME JEALOUS

**faithfulwife:** it worked didn't it

**jeffersass:** YES

**feel the burrn:** wow

**madelicious:** jfc

**jeffersass:** J EMMY LET'S GET A CAT

**madelicious:** you're allergic to cats thomas

**jeffersass:** BUT

**madelicious:** no

**faithfulwife:** ooooooh james layin down the law aaron get the popcorn

**feel the burrn:** Theo don't encourage them

**faithfulwife:** :P

**feel the burrn:** :P

**jeffersass:** yall cute

**madelicious:** goals

**jeffersass:** SERIOUSLY THOUGH JAMES PLEASE LET ME GET A LITTLE KITTY CAT

**feel the burrn:** is it just the hair that gives you allergies 

**jeffersass:** yeah 

**feel the burrn:** well then why don't you just get one of those hairless cats I heard that hospitals give them to people with cancer 

**faithfulwife:** look at my baby being all smart aw <3

**feel the burrn:** <3

**jeffersass:** seriously stop being goals I stg im gonna puke 

**jeffersass:** BU T JAMES LET'S GET A LITTLE HAIRLESS BABY KITTEN WE CAN BUY IT LITTLE SWEATERS FOR THE WINTER 

**jeffersass:** TELL ME THAT WOULDN'T BE THE CUTEST THING

**madelicious:** thomas we really don't have money to take care of a cat and you can't even keep a plant alive

**madelicious:** knowing you you'll feed it once and then it's my responsibility

**jeffersass:** I SWEAR TO GOD I'LL TAKE CARE OF IT AND FEED IT AND LOVE IT PLEASE PLEASE PLE A SE JAMES

**madelicious:** our apartment doesn't even allow pets 

**jeffersass:** PEOPLE KEEP PETS IN APARTMENTS WHEN THEY ARENT ALLOWED ALL THE TIME THAT'S NOT EVEN AN EXCUSE PLEASE

**faithfulwife:** oh come on james just let him have a little raw chicken cat

**faithfulwife:** aaron back me up

**feel the burrn:** i admit it would be kinda cute

**jeffersass:** ^THREE OVER ONE HA^

**madelicious:** no

**jeffersass:** YOU RAT

**faithfulwife:** James don't be a debbie downer

**feel the burrn:** cats help with depression it's been proven

**madelicious:** neither of us have depression 

**feel the burrn:** ok but they also help a lot with stress. Cats are a naturally calming presence in any household

**jeffersass:** ^^^^^^

**faithfulwife:** get it aaron

**madelicious:** fuck fine

**jeffersass:** YES OH MY GOD AARON ILY

**feel the burrn:** you owe me a big mac

**jeffersass:** FUCK THAT I'M BUYING YOU THREE BIG MACS

**madelicious:** we can go to the pet shop tomorrow and pick one out okay

**jeffersass:** YOU'RE AMAZING THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU

**madelicious:** yeah yeah ok

**feel the burrn:** my work here is done

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So if yall want me to do what I did with the Hamilsquad and gave them a detailed fic and make one for jeffmads buying the cat then let me know ok


	9. i am not throwin away my shot  (of tequila)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> pussy squad.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *peeks out of a corner* haha.... hi...  
> I'm back!?  
> Yes.
> 
> AND I'M SO SORRY IT TOOK SO LONG I HAVEN'T WRITTEN ANYTHING IN MONTHS BC WRITERS BLOCK EHICH IS A ITTY-BITTY SMEXCUSE BC THIS ISNT AT ALL A SERIOUS SERIES IM SO SORRY FUCKERVS

**jeffersass >> madelicious, faithfulwife, feel the burrn **

**jeffersass:** I GOT THE KITTY

 **madelicious:** we* got the kitty

 **faithfulwife:** AHH CONGRATS ON BEING DADS

 **feel the burrn:** what's its name

 **jeffersass:** TEQUILA

 **faithfulwife:** …..

 **feel the burrn:** ……..

 **madelicious:** my same reaction

 **jeffersass:** WHY

 **feel the burrn:** let me just put this lightly

 **feel the burrn:** that's the most ghetto ass name ive ever heard in my life

 **faithfulwife:** “lightly”

 **madelicious:** hes right though

 **faithfulwife:** how did this name come to be

 **madelicious:** we did did a coin toss to settle who got to name her and he won

 **jeffersass:** I WOLD COMMENT ON HOW MUCH YOU PEOPLE ARE HATERS BUT I'M TOO BUSY WITH MY LOVING DAUGHTER

 **madelicious:** ok but she is rly cute ngl

 **feel the burrn:** send pics

**jeffersass has sent a picture.**

**faithfulwife:** thomas ily but im gonna have to steal your cat

 **jeffersass:** try me u side

 **madelicious:** i feel like… a dad. ..

 **feel the burrn:** maybe we should get a cat

 **faithfulwife:** can we?

 **jeffersass:** EXCUSE ME IDEA STEALER

 **madelicious:** you stole the idea from alexander

 **faithfulwife:** hold up Thomas how did you survive the pets store

 **jeffersass:** i broke out into hives before we could even get into the store so I sat on a bench that was like ten feet away from the store and was on facetime w James

 **faithfulwife:** goals

 **jeffersass:** ehh

 **madelicious:** anyway you guys are getting one?

 **faithfulwife:** i mean we have the space for it

 **jeffersass:** we'll be the pussy squad

 **madelicious:** pussy squad?

 **feel the burrn:** pussy squad.

 **faithfulwife:** PUSSY SQUAD

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ill post jeffmads trip to the pet shop some point today or tomorrow ;)


	10. jeffmads angst

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> James is tired of waiting.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Idk if this is actual angst tbfh Im listening to sad music have mercy

**madelicious >> jeffersass **

**madelicious:** Thomas, we seriously need to talk.

**jeffersass:** What's wrong?

**madelicious:** We need to tell them.

**jeffersass:** I don't understand.

**madelicious:** Don't play dumb.

**madelicious:** You know exactly what I mean.

**jeffersass:** Jem, you know I can't. Not now at least.

**madelicious:** Why? We've been hiding it for months. You know no one will judge us or hurt us. This isn't the 50s. Hell, Aaron is trans! What makes you think he or Theodosia won't accept us. Even Alexander wouldn't mind.

**jeffersass:** James, please.

**madelicious:** No, Thomas. This needs to happen. You said you loved me.

**jeffersass:** Don't you dare say I don't because you know I do. I love you more than anything else in the world. I just need time.

**madelicious:** HOW MUCH TIME DO YOU NEED? We've been together for months. You can't possibly need more time. I know what your family life was like, but you don't have to worry about it anymore. Please, believe that.

**jeffersass has left the conversation.**

**madelicious:** Fuck

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This'll only last for a few days dw


	11. out

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This weird "when will he come out" shit isn't working so here u go im not even gonna make an excuse for not updating im just kinda done with everything rn  
> Enjoy

**jeffersass >> madelicious **

**jeffersass:** james i think i want to tell the others about us

 **madelicious:** you sure?

 **jeffersass:** yeah i was thinking about how tired I was of hiding and not being able to be intimate with you in public and that made me really depressed so im ready

 **jeffersass:** im just scared I'll seem like less of a man

 **madelicious:** burr at one point had a woman's body and that doesn't make him less of a man does it

 **jeffersass:** i guess not

 **madelicious:** then you have nothing to worry about

 **madelicious:** you want to tell them or should I

 **jeffersass:** you do it

 

**madelicious >> jeffersass, feel the burrn, faithfulwife **

**madelicious:** me and Thomas fuck and we've been in a relationship for the past year

 **jeffersass:** dont lay it down gently for them James jfc

 **feel the burrn:** we know

 **jeffersass:** what

 **madelicious:** how

 **feel the burrn:** it was p obvious

 **faithfulwife:** yall ain't slick

 **faithfulwife:** we know that james is pan but wbu tom

 **faithfulwife:** are you bi or something

 **jeffersass:** idk I've only ever liked women. James is the only other dude I've liked

 **feel the burrn:** homoflexible?

 **jeffersass:** fuck is that

 **faithfulwife:** you basically only like women but sometimes when a guy walks in you'll be like *two eye emojis, wet emoji, tongue emoji*

 **madelicious:** christ

 **jeffersass:** maybe???

 **jeffersass:** hell if I know

 **madelicious:** it's ok

 **jeffersass:** thank

 **jefferass:** S

 **madelicious:** welc

 **madelicious:** ome

 **jeffersass:** kys

 **feel the burrn:** true love

 **faithfulwife:** cannnnn you feeeeel the loooove toniiiiight

 **feel the burrn:** Thomas how's it feel to be out

 **jeffersass:** im shitting my pants, I'm kinda excited, and sort of wanna tell more people

 **faithfulwife:** DO IT

 **jeffersass:** doing it

 

**jeffersass >> madelicious, faithfulwife, feel the burrn, john cena, ham & cheese, eliza schuyscraper, angelicool, marg simpson, hercules the olympian, gilbert did ur momtier,**

**jeffersass:** me and james are dating

 **gilbert did ur momtier:** CONGRATULATIONS ILY BOTH

 **marg simpson:** YESS

 **ham & cheese: **idgaf

 **eliza schuyscraper:** alex shush

 **hercules the olympian:** i hear wedding bells

 **john cena:** ur still trash but congrats ig

 **marg simpson:** CAN I BE THE FLOWER GIRL

 **hercules the olympian:** HOE THAT'S MY JOB

 **marg simpson:** SBHAGEGED NO

 **madelicious:** children please you can both be the flower girls

 **marg simpson:** HUZZAH

 **hercules the olympian:** :D

 **angelicool:** I'M SO PROUD OR MY BOYZZZZ

 **feel the burrn:** they really thought it wasn't obvious that they were in love

 **jeffersass:** were not in LOVE

 **ham & cheese: **james we used to be friends and as a past friend i gotta say u could have done better

 **jeffersass:** that's it im calling immigration

 **ham & cheese: **IM LEGAL YOU FILTHY FUCK

 **jeffersass:** SHOW ME THE DOCUMENTS

 **ham & cheese: **ILL BEAT YOUR ASS

 **jeffersass:** YEAH YOU'LL BEAT MY ASS LIKE YOU DID THE NIGHT I SENT YOU TO THE HOSPITAL

 **ham & cheese: **I WAS DRUNK OK

 **jeffersass:** I WAS TOO TF

 **ham & cheese: **YOU WANNA GO AGAIN YOU FUCKING TREE

 **angelicool:** girls girls ur both pretty

 **eliza schuyscraper:** should've known this would go south

 **madelicious:** thomas if you stop being an idiot we can wear pink jackets and watch mean girls

 **ham & cheese: **ugh

 **jeffersass:** k bye yall

**jeffersass has left the chat.**


	12. boredom

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> thomas is bored. james isn't having it

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It's short ik but I was in a p good mood yesterday so I wrote this. I thought it was funny at least so I hope yall like it too  
> Enjoy

**jeffersass >> madelicious **

**jeffersass:** hey hey

 **jeffersass:** hey James

 **jeffersass:** james

 **madelicious:** what

 **jeffersass:** send nudes

 **madelicious:** what the fuck no im at work

 **jeffersass:** Wendy's has bathrooms

 **madelicious:** what the fuck do you think will happen if someone finds out the manager what taking naked pictures of himself in the bathroom

 **madelicious:** was*

 **jeffersass:** just don't tell anyone come onnnn

 **jeffersass:** ik you're on break

 **madelicious:** how do you know

 **jeffersass:** you a always ignore me unless you are

 **jeffersass:** im always stuck having to lay around at home

 **madelicious:** idc

 **jeffersass:** ill send one back

 **madelicious:** im at work what's wrong with you

 **jeffersass:** im bored

**madelicious has blocked jeffersass.**

 

 **jeffersass:** aaron james blocked me for asking for nudes

 **feel the burrn:** isn't he at work

 **jeffersass:** yeah so

 **feel the burrn:** sweet jesus

 **jeffersass:** pls

 **feel the burrn:** please what

 **jeffersass:** love me

**feel the burrn has blocked jeffersass.**

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yes James madison is a Wendy's manager


	13. motherfuck

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> idk how to summarize this just read it

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hiiii idk why I wrote this but oh well  
> I was bored  
> Enjoy

**madelicious >> jeffersass, feel the burrn, faithfulwife **

**madelicious:** if I kill Thomas rn would you guys call the cops on me

**feel the burrn:** depends on what he did

**jeffersass:** I DIDNT DO IT DON'T BELIEVE HIM

**madelicious:** he threw all the cats toys away because he had a nightmare that she used them to choke him while he cooked

**madelicious:** now Tequila is fucking up everything with her nails

**feel the burrn:** eh I won't call the cops

**faithfulwife:** if you were worried about us calling the cops why would you ask us

**madelicious:** you make a good point

**jeffersass:** IT WASN'T MY PROUDEST MOMENT BUT SHE'S NOT BEING THAT BAD

**madelicious:** thomas she just finished playing in your hair wym she's not being that bad

**madelicious:** you threatened to give her to panda express

**faithfulwife:** do you have a video of Thomas getting attacked

**feel the burrn:** ^

**madelicious:** you know i do

**jeffersass:** WHY

**madelicious has sent a video.**

**feel the burrn:** i wish I were there

**jeffersass:** YOU MOTHER FUCK

**faithfulwife:** am i the fuckling if he's the mother fuck

**madelicious:** i too wish to be a fuckling

**feel the burrn:** come children, away from thomas

**jeffersass:** haha thanks i hate you all

**madelicious:** love you

**jeffersass:** ew who is this trash texting me

**madelicious:** boy I will come over there and whoop your ass

**faithfulwife:** kinky

**jeffersass:** daddy ;)

**feel the burrn:** idk bout yall but every time someone calls their partner daddy I always think of my dead father

**faithfulwife:** i think of you ;))

**madelicious:** oh my

**jeffersass:** ooooooh

**feel the burrn:** blocked 

**madelicious:** aaron you are the mother fuck you have to be daddy

**feel the burrn has left the chat.**

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Tag urself im Aaron's dead father

**Author's Note:**

> this was probably shit lmao it's cool tho the rest of this may not be as bad (it'll be worse)  
> bye for now yall


End file.
